The Heartbreaker (Amish Country Brides) Read online

  “I don’t know.” He grimaced as he attempted to sit up. He hugged his middle with his good arm. “Ahh! I think one of my ribs might be busted.” He panted.

  She gasped. “I’ll go call a driver to take you to the hospital.”

  “Miri, no.” He reached out his good hand. “Please. I don’t want to make my grossdawdi worry. Besides, I already have enough to pay with my hospital bills from the accident. Will you please just help me up? Help me into the house.”

  “Michael…” She was about to protest, then reluctantly nodded. “Okay.” She crouched next to him and slipped her arm behind his back. “On the count of three, we’re going to stand up.”

  “Three.” He nodded, holding his breath in anticipation of the pain.

  “Put your arm around me.”

  “I thought you’d never ask.” He teased in spite of his agony.

  She attempted to frown at him, but he knew she fought a grin. “Do you ever stop joking?”

  He shook his head. “How fun would life be then?”

  “Ready? One. Two. Three.” She grasped his arm with her other hand and carefully pulled him to a standing position.

  He immediately grabbed onto one of the barn poles, breathing heavily.

  “Are you all right?”

  “I’ll be fine. I just need a minute.” He inhaled several more labored breaths.

  “Would it be better if I ran to the house and got your crutch?”

  “I don’t think so. If you’ll just help me walk to the house.” Besides, he wanted her near.

  “Okay.”

  She gripped his waist and his good arm tightened around her. He hobbled to the house as best as he could, wincing with each step. If it wasn’t so agonizing, he’d be enjoying this a whole lot more.

  “Are you all right?”

  “I’ll get through it.”

  She opened the screen door. “Where do you want to go?”

  “The bedroom.” He added a hint of suggestiveness to his voice just to ignite her ire. He loved seeing the beautiful blush on her cheeks when he teased her.

  Her brow shot up faster than a gunman’s draw in the Wild West.

  He cleared his throat. “To rest and hopefully put something on this,” he clarified. Although…

  “Would you rather have something hot or cold on it?”

  “My face or my ribs?”

  “Both.”

  He gently lowered himself onto the bed. “Ice will be great for my busted lip. I think maybe something hot might soothe my ribs.”

  “I’ll go get something. Can you take off your shirt?”

  “This must be my lucky day.” He couldn’t help his smile. Or his teasing.

  Miri just shook her head.

  “Truthfully, I think I’m going to need help. If you would?”

  She nodded slowly, then sat next to him on the bed.

  His heart pounded hard at Miri’s closeness. He swallowed as her deft fingers worked to unbutton his blood-stained shirt. Had her hand brushed against his chest on purpose, or was it just wishful thinking on his part? He was probably delirious. If only she’d lean a little closer and brush his lips with hers. He shook the thought off and attempted to assist her by sliding his arm through the sleeve. He needed to get his act together. He couldn’t ruin this.

  Her face filled with horror. “Oh, Michael! You look terrible.”

  “Not exactly the reaction a man hopes for when removing his shirt for a lady.” He chuckled but it ended in a wince.

  “Look at that bruise. It must hurt like crazy.”

  “Jah, it does. But I suppose I deserved it.”

  “You mind telling me what happened?”

  “Jealous husband.” He grimaced.

  She frowned with her whole face, then promptly stood from the bed.

  He was tempted to reach for her. “Look, Miri. I wasn’t the perfect saint out in the Englisch world.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Like you’ve ever been the perfect saint.”

  “Ouch. That wasn’t nice.”

  “Would you rather I lie?”

  “Lie? No. But a little flattery goes a long way.”

  “I’m not into flattery. You should know that by now. People only use flattery when they want something from you.”

  “See, Miri, that’s what I like about you. You hate my guts but you still helped me.”

  A hurt look flashed across her face. “I don’t hate you.”

  “Really? Hmm…you won’t talk to me. You don’t want to be my friend…” He shrugged. “Seems like it.”

  “I’m talking to you now, aren’t I?”

  “Only because it’s the cordial thing to do.”

  “I’ll go get your ice pack.” She fled from the room like her hair had caught fire.

  Jah, he’d blown it. Again.

  FIFTEEN

  This cannot be happening. Miriam berated herself. How could Michael Eicher still have such an effect on her? She’d been trying so hard to ignore him, to build up an immunity to his charms, but she clearly was not inoculated yet. She was beginning to believe there was no cure. That the undoing of her heart was inevitable. Either that or he possessed some sort of unseen power over her thoughts and emotions.

  Why couldn’t this catastrophe have happened when Sammy was here instead of her? Not that she wanted Sammy to see his gross sohn in such a state. Or add extra stress to his life. Okay, so maybe it was a better idea for her to be present during that whole ordeal than Sammy.

  Ugh.

  Maybe she should just march over to Michael and tell him how it was going to be. She would tell him, in no uncertain terms, that she would never, ever let him court her again. That she wasn’t interested in him. That she wasn’t attracted to him in the least.

  But that would be a lie. Of course she was attracted to Michael Eicher. Who wouldn’t be? But that didn’t mean she had to fall head-over-heels for him every time he was around. She knew, probably better than anybody in this district, what he was like. Both the good and the bad. And the bad was enough for her to steer clear of him. But she couldn’t do that right now. No, he had to go and get himself beaten.

  Ugh.

  “Miri?” Michael’s strained voice called from the other room. “Do you have that hot pack yet? My ribs are killing me.”

  She swallowed. “Jah. I’ll be there in a minute.”

  There was no time to dwell on her volatile emotions at present. A patient needed tending to. And right now, she was the only one who could be a nurse to him.

  She entered the bedroom with an icepack in one hand and a hot towel in the other. “Here, put his on your lip.”

  He winced as he held the icepack to his face. “Oo…it’s cold.”

  She quickly looked away after realizing she’d been staring at his toned arm. “Don’t be a baby.”

  She glanced down at the hot towel in her hand. Great, she should have given this one to him first so he could put it on his ribs. Now, she’d have to be the one to do it.

  Michael looked up and seemed to read the indecision in her eyes. “Don’t be a baby.” He playfully repeated her words.

  “I…” She huffed, frustrated that he’d rattled her. “Fine.”

  He was enjoying this attention way too much.

  She could do this. She folded the steaming towel in half and gently placed it over his bruised ribs, doing her best not to notice the gentle curves defining his chest or the way his abdomen flexed when she’d come near. Ach, he looked better now than he had five years ago, if that were even possible. He must’ve been working out at one of those fancy gyms when he’d been out in the Englisch world, because she was quite certain he hadn’t been lifting bales of hay.

  “Aah!” he hollered.

  Fortunately, she’d been yanked out of her improper thoughts and quickly pulled back. “Are you okay?”

  His grin spread across his face. “I was teasing.”

  She planted a hand on her hip and shook her head. “You know, I should really leave a
nd let you handle this by yourself. You seem to be doing just fine.”

  “Come on, Miri. I’m just trying to find humor in a painful situation here. If it makes you feel better, it really does hurt. Badly.”

  “You’re taking advantage of me.”

  “Maybe. But I need you.” His voice had softened. “In more ways than one.”

  “Michael…”

  “Please? Just give us another chance. Just one more. If I screw it up this time, I won’t ever ask again. Miri, I want to start over with you.”

  “Nee.”

  Her conversation with Nora flashed through her mind. What if he’s sincere?

  ~

  Michael prayed inwardly. Please, God. “Tell me why.”

  “Why? There are a thousand reasons. But let’s just start with one. I could never trust you again.”

  “But…I’m different now, Miri. I’ve decided to join the church.” He reasoned.

  “Vows mean nothing to you.” She stared at him hard.

  “I admit that used to be the case, but like I said, I’ve changed.”

  “I’m sorry, Michael. I wish I could believe you. But I don’t.”

  “Why? Do you not believe a person can change?”

  “Nee, I do. I just don’t believe you have changed.”

  “I don’t know what I can do to convince you.” He felt like weeping. “I’m trying here, Miri! I want to begin a relationship with you. I want you as mei fraa.” Did he sound as desperate as he felt?

  She closed her eyes and shook her head. “It’s too late for that.”

  He dared to reach out and touch her hand. “Nee, it’s not too late. You are still single and so am I.”

  “So you want to marry me…again? Like last time, ain’t so?” She tugged her hand away.

  “No. Not like last time.” A weight settled on his heart and pressed down hard. Ach, he’d shredded every ounce of trust Miri had. He didn’t know how he would get it back. “I admit it that I didn’t mean those words back then. I only wanted one thing and I would do just about anything to get it. I was wrong, Miri. I didn’t deserve you.

  “The truth, Miri, is that I began to care for you in ways I couldn’t understand. But I wasn’t anywhere near the settling down stage yet. And I guess part of me was scared. I wasn’t ready to assume a full-fledged Amish life with all its rules and responsibilities. When I realized that, I stopped taking you home from the gatherings. I thought if I began seeing someone else, I wouldn’t think of you anymore. It didn’t work. That’s when I decided I needed to leave the community altogether.”

  “Jah, but then you became Englisch and had fancy women, ain’t so?”

  He prayed she’d never find out how many. How he wished he could go back and erase those years, that time in his life, all his foolish decisions. But he couldn’t. That was who he was then. “Jah,” he sighed. “I did.”

  “But if you truly cared for me, you would not have done that.”

  “It’s hard to explain. Before I began courting you, I’d already…well, I’d given myself away. More than once. It created this desire inside me that could not be quenched. It became like an addiction. I had to have it.” He hung his head. “If there was anything I could change in my past, that would be it. But there is nothing I can do about it now.”

  “And I’m to believe you will be happily married to one woman after you’ve shared the marriage bed with many? Nee, I’d be even more foolish than last time. I’d have a husband who would deem me inadequate. A husband who would compare me to every other woman he’d been with and leave me, to seek fulfillment elsewhere. A husband that would leave me to raise a houseful of kinner alone and that I’d never be able to get away from because we do not believe in divorce. Nee, I won’t do it.”

  “But I’ve changed, Miri! For real. I wish to God that you would believe me. Won’t you please give me another chance? I promise I will not be any of those things. That is not the life I seek anymore.”

  “What if I’m not enough for you? I cannot be married to a man who desires other women. I won’t do it, Michael. I’d rather remain an alt maedel my entire life than have to deal with an unfaithful husband. I just couldn’t bear it.” Tears pricked her eyes. “It crushed me when you left last time.”

  “I really am sorry about that, Miri. And truthfully, you will never be enough for me. But Der Herr is enough. He is enough for you. He is enough for me. Whatever happens, it is Der Herr who will be there constantly. He promises to never leave us or forsake us.”

  “I think you should move on. Without me. Find someone else. Maybe that will be enough for someone else, but it just isn’t for me.”

  “Someone else? There is no someone else.”

  “Well, there is no me either. I’m sorry, Michael.”

  “Why? Just tell me why you don’t believe I can change. Am I beyond God’s power?” He fought back the tears that welled in his eyes.

  She stared at him, as though searching his soul, as though grasping for a thread of truth in his words. She shook her head. “When you left our people, were you aware that I left too?”

  “Jah, someone…my grossdawdi, I think, mentioned that you’d left for a time.”

  A tear slipped beneath her eyelash, trailing her cheek, then another. She brushed them away with shaky hands. “Nobody knew. I was in the familye way. I carried your sohn, our sohn, for nine months. I lived among strangers, Englischers, until I had him.” She shook her head and forced away another avalanche of wetness with her dress sleeve. “I wanted to keep him. I longed to…I wanted so much to have a happy family, a husband who would love me and our boppli more than anyone in the world. But I realized that would never happen. Nee, he’d only grow up in shame and humiliation when he realized what kind of vatter and mudder he had. I did not want that for him, so I gave him up—hoping, praying, that he would grow up in a home with love. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of him, wonder how he’s doing. Is he happy? Does he feel loved? Have his adopted parents told him he’d been born to someone else?”

  His jaw dropped at her revelation. He had a son? They had a son? His mouth opened, then closed again. Ach, what could he say to that? What a dummkopp he’d been!

  “I…” He shrugged, not having a clue what to say. She’d been right. Even if he’d known about it then, he wouldn’t have had the maturity to properly father a child. “Ach, Miri. I’m so sorry.”

  He dared to touch her shoulder, longing to hold her. To somehow help ease her sorrow.

  She jerked away. “Don’t! Just don’t!”

  His gaze trailed her as she ran from the room. He felt completely helpless just lying there in this bed. He couldn’t even run after her. His own eyes stung with unshed tears as he realized the enormity of it all. No wonder she hated him! He’d been the most selfish person alive. He’d fulfilled his lust then left her with a gaping hole in her heart, still bleeding till this day.

  He bowed his head and whispered a prayer. “God, please help! I need You. I cannot fix this on my own. You are the only one who can heal Miri’s heart.”

  His heart sank into his stomach. This wasn’t an acceptable outcome. Somehow, he’d prove to her that she could trust him—that in spite of everything that had happened, they could still make it work. He had no idea how, but he was determined to make it a reality. Now more than ever.

  ~

  Dawdi walked into Michael’s bedroom, just as he’d shifted, groaning loudly. “Want to talk about it?”

  “This?” He pointed to his face. “Just my past coming back to haunt me, is all. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.” He shrugged.

  Dawdi eyed his swollen lip and put two and two together. “I’m afraid the law of sowing and reaping doesn’t just go away, even after you’ve given your heart to Der Herr.”

  “Apparently not. I deserved this and more.”

  “Do you need a doctor?” Dawdi’s brow furrowed in concern.

  “I figured I’d just wait until I go in to have my casts removed. I can
ask then if it’s still bothering me.” By the pain he was experiencing now, he knew it would be.

  “What is wrong?”

  “Mostly my ribs. Although I’m not sure if they are dislocated, cracked, or just bruised.” He grimaced as he pulled in a breath.

  “You could see my chiropractor. He should be able to tell.”

  “Is he open today?”

  “I think probably.”

  “Great. Let’s make an appointment then.”

  ~

  Michael had never been so thankful for chiropractors in his life. The doctor correctly guessed that his rib had likely only been dislocated. After a quick x-ray to assure that his assumptions were correct and it hadn’t been cracked, he made an adjustment—which had been excruciating at the time—but seemed to have done miracles. Although Michael was still bruised, he could now breathe easily and his pain had greatly subsided.

  Michael felt like giving the chiropractor a hug, but he refrained. He’d bet money that he hadn’t been the first patient to have that thought, though. He guessed some probably had indeed hugged the man. The miracle worker.

  Now, to get his casts removed next week. Things were looking up.

  SIXTEEN

  Michael had been pondering the situation with Miri since their conversation the other day. At least now all their cards were on the table and they knew the truth. That was something. But where should he go from here? Miri had stated, rather clearly, that she had no intentions of ever getting back together.

  It seemed hopeless. But he was not one to give up easily when he saw something he wanted. And he wanted a real relationship with Miri more than he’d ever wanted anything in his life.

  But the question was, how did he go about pursuing that relationship?

  ~

  Michael moved his arm around in a circle several times, thankful to have the use of it again. It had felt a little stiff since his cast had been removed, but he didn’t let that stop him. The doctor had told him to use it as much as comfortably possible to get his full range of motion back. He walked with a limp, but the doctor had assured that his leg would get stronger each day. He was just glad he was now able to take a normal shower. Since his casts had to stay dry, he’d had to use plastic bags and rubber bands to ensure moisture wouldn’t enter them, which had been extremely inconvenient and caused his showers to take twice as long. It was funny how having an injury involuntarily taught one not to take normal things for granted.